For fear of what I may find

We all say that should anything happen to our children we would go out searching. But if that tragic event did happen to us, the question is could we?  Could what we might find deter us out of fear?  Is it a crime to admit that you couldn’t search for your missing child because of what you might find?

Of course not.  It takes a very strong person to go out searching for their missing child.  The fear of what they could find would be so strong that they could easily step back and allow others to search.

Just imagine if you did go out searching and found your lifeless missing child.  You might want to hug them, but that would be wrong, because you could disturb forensics.  In fact Police sometimes prefer it if parents stay at home whilst they and others search, for fear of a parent disturbing potential evidence and a crime scene.

Back in 1976 a little boy Sandy Davidson disappeared from his back garden, whilst playing with his sister.  Someone leaned over andopened the gate and Sandy wondered out of the gate and strolled off down the back alley holding a man’s hand.  His sister blacked out the memory from her mind, but on hypnosis she remembers, Sandy walking away with this man and holding his hand.

The full story can be read here and this is the video of the case where, Margaret, Sandy’s mum categorically states she could not go out searching for fear of what she might find.

With regards to the Lisa Irwin case, according to the search warrants (PDF) one of the reasons that the Police became suspicious is because of Deborah Bradley stated in an interview, with the Police that she didn’t search behind the house because “She was afraid of what she might find”.

Two mothers, with missing children both unable to search.  Is it a crime?

No most definitely not, sometimes unfortunately missing people are found in grotesque surroundings. Their bodies could have been mutilated and what mother wants to see her child’s mutilated body? What mother wants to discover her dead child?

I don’t know if Deborah Bradley harmed her child or not.  But I won’t go pointing the finger of blame and accuse her of being guilty until the evidence is tried and tested in Court.  Until the police charge this woman and a Jury finds her guilty she is innocent and should be treated with such respect.

If those making assumptions and speculating of how she did it, find that Deborah Bradley didn’t harm her child, apart from writing a missing child off of dead, they have through their speculation added to a mother’s pain.

When we discuss things with our friends in our homes or down the local, it is a conversation between friends.  What we post on the internet is read by millions.  And if a person is innocent comments winging their way around the internet accusing them of being guilty will never be wiped away.  They will be there forever and a day.

Kate McCann is criticised everyday because she did not thump on doors demanding access to properties to see if her daughter was there.. she is criticised for not searching enough in the eyes of her critics.. but seriously have they ever thought that Kate McCann might have felt the same way.. had a fear of what she may find?  No I doubt it, because to think like that shoes empathy and compassion… something these people don’t have.

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